An Open Letter Regarding Contrasting Endurance Cultures - Running, Triathlon, OCR, etc.

The context for this post: all endurance athletes (runners, swimmers, cyclists, climbers, triathletes, obstacle course racers, marathoners, track athletes, ultra runners, trail runners, road runners, etc.) have a similar, yet slightly different culture. We all have distinct jargon (terms that refer to idiosyncrasies of our sport, even words that are different that mean the same thing). This past Sunday, I ran the Santa Monica Classic 10k, and for the first time in a local road race, pushed my daughter in a jogging stroller. I've run a very small 5k in Brooklyn pushing my daughter, and I've done tons of miles (primarily when she was about 8 months old until she was about 18 months old) with her in training. But this past Sunday was different. As I worked my way into the starting corral (immediately after the 5k race was sent off and the 10k runners loaded in), one girl took notable exception to my being near her with a jogging stroller. This is an Open Letter to her, that I hope stimulates some dialog between our contrasting (and at times conflicting) cultures. This is not to say that one is right and the other is wrong, but to acknowledge that each culture should seek to understand those that share our endurance lifestyle, and understand that when we cross-polinate, and try other disciplines, it may not be what we've grown accustomed to...

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Dear Anonymous Triathlete Girl,

I'm the dad pushing a stroller in the corral that you threw a tantrum at last weekend. I am that completely random stranger who responded by asking you what your race goal was (to which you responded "42-minutes" which I can remember clear-as-day because it's Jackie Robinson's number, and was about the time I thought I would run that day) and when I then offered to pace you to that goal whilst pushing 55-lbs of toddler and wheeled machine of death you subsequently ignored me, not even offering a halfway polite "no thank you", nor even eye contact from that point forward. Not only did you non-respond, but you demonstratively turned your back to me because I wasn't doing exactly what you wanted me to do. I am still not sure whether your female and male companions were mortified by your behavior, or if they too were giving me the "sharks with friggin' lasers on their heads" stare for being the stroller-guy sandwiched up in the front 250 people in a 3,000 person race. I sensed your race nerves and that the event was important to you, so I chose not to say something awful back to you. I gave you a temporary pass.

Here's the thing: most stand alone road races allow runners with strollers to compete (my favorite race of this sort is the Redondo Super Bowl 10k, that actually has a separate stroller race/division). I had as much right to be there in that corral as you did. Our crew specifically sought out a family-friendly, strollers-allowed race to run with our young children, and some of us wanted to do that as fast as we possibly could. Athletes are asked to "self-seed" at a race like that (whereas 10k plus person races generally have pace-per-mile signs posted to aid in this self-seeding), and as someone who ended up finishing 65th overall, I had more people in front of me than there needed to be (it took me a full 11-seconds to cross the starting line). I was very conscious about my race-lines, not running over feet or clipping heels. Let me tell ya, it was one of the most difficult 10k's of my life, having to zigzag while pushing my 2.5-year-old daughter was rough. Going up that 2-3% grade to get to the the turn-around on San Vicente built a new room in my pain cave. My daughter tossed her green racing car out of the stroller twice and trying to pick up something while pushing 55-lbs upgrade/uphill while at a race intensity pace, well, damn, you should try it sometime. It's awful. But I'm not asking for your sympathy. I enjoy the hurt locker, quite a bit.

I do get it, nobody likes being passed, nor beat by any parent pushing a stroller. At that very same race, many years ago, I ran 36:13 (my personal best) and had a dad pushing a stroller run 35:30-ish in front of me. Again, a little over a year ago, I was 4th overall at a 5k pushing my daughter in a stroller and was soundly beat by a guy pushing twin 3-year-olds in a double-stroller. No hard feelings either time, just mad props to those badass dads setting a pretty stellar example to kids who won't quite understand why that's so awesome, maybe ever (or until they have children of their own and try to run a fast race while pushing them). At the very least, I take precious little joy in my finishing position. I'm an effort conscious and time-minded athlete. If I run a time I'm capable of and if I worked hard for it, that's satisfying to me. That doesn't mean I won't push myself for position during a race, I mean, what's the point in dropping some coin unless we can push ourselves to be the best we can be with-and-against other competition. I respect my competition. Always. I let my legs, heart, and toughness do the talking for me. I never tell anyone in the corral they shouldn't be near nor in front of me. Nor should you. Nor should anyone.

I'm hoping that somehow this makes it's way to you, and you either find a way to be polite to others planning to suffer alongside you, or maybe select events that don't allow strollers (the LA Marathon, and pretty much ANY triathlon). But, I suggest that you treat someone pushing a stroller with a bit more respect, as the Boston Marathon (a race you've publicly declared you'll run) has a guy who pushes a huge stroller (well, it's more of a strolling-wheelchair) and he also does the Kona Ironman (towing his son in a friggin' BOAT), in fact, he's one of my personal heroes and inspiration to millions. I passed this father-son duo at the Boston Marathon years ago, and I cheered for him and shook his hand. His son cheered for me. It gave me a ton more juice to finish a tough Boston that year. 

Dick and Rick Hoyt aka TEAM HOYT at Boston

In closing, I sincerely congratulate you for putting the training in, showing up on race day and running your PR in the 10k. I didn't displace you in your division, nor did my 2.5-year-old daughter (although, when she's about 14, watch out in the female overall division at local events). If we ever bump into each other at another race or local group run, I'll buy ya a beer (or your favorite beverage) to show ya there's really no hard feelings. I wish you luck in your upcoming races in 2017 and beyond. I hope you get into Boston and crush it. Give Rick and Dick Hoyt a high five from me...

With Respect,
Jimmy Dean Freeman

Coyote Running Founder and Head Coach

Road/Track/Trail Runner w/300+ Races of Experience

Running After the Joneses - the Comparative Paradigm Trap

Photo by Gareth Mackay

This has become all too common in today's day of social media and instant information: you hear someone talk about running their first marathon, and someone else, often a non-runner will say, "hey you gotta beat Oprah's / P. Diddy's time!"  For what it's worth, I do believe it's great to have goals and sub-goals to keep yourself motivated.  Oprah (for the record) ran 4:29:15 and P-Diddy ran 4:14:54. It was on record that Diddy, or Puffy Combs or Sean or whatever he is calling himself now also wanted to beat Oprah's time.

Keeping up with the Joneses, or in this case, running after the Joneses is a very dangerous game. It is an extension of life lived in the comparative paradigm. The chief problem with the comparative paradigm is that we almost always put ourselves in deficit. We always have LESS than the Joneses, we're always LESS fit than those we're aspiring to be like and/or LESS fast or LESS tough.

I'm not suggesting that having idols, role models or heroes is unhealthy. But rather, when your goals (and/or dreams) are based around being "as good as someone else" or in some cases "better than someone else" it starts first with the premise that you are PRESENTLY LESS ____*blank____ (*insert your less word here: talented, genetically predisposed, wealthy, fast, tough, etc.).  Being less than someone else causes a whole other issue too, as it has us focusing on being (or beating) THEM and not just being the best version of us/me that we/I can be. (yeah, the English there is hard to follow, but give it one more read for good measure.)  When you are not focused on being the best YOU that you can be, you tune out your own body/mind's present in-the-moment needs.  It all becomes about being them, or being better than them.

Take this one step further... you've grown a little bored of marathoning.  Now you've moved onto Ironman distance triathalons OR ultra-distance mountain races.  You see these ultra-crazy people around you, you read the articles in magazines and in blogs, you start to want to train/race like those people.  Yet you're only getting a small snapshot of their life. In many cases, you don't know their genetic predisposition to speed/distance, nor their history and experience (in some cases these people have run their whole lives while we may only have a few months or a few years under the soles of our shoes) and trying to emulate something before you're really ready can lead to sickness, injury and setbacks (and these setbacks can at times have huge emotional consequences).

I invite you to take a moment to evaluate your life and your present goals and dreams. Are they grounded in being the best version of you, yet? Or are they smelling a little like they were birthed in the comparative paradigm (doing something because someone else did it)?  If you discover (like I have, from time to time) that you're putting yourself at the low end of the totem pole, break that cycle. Reassess.  Recreate from a baseline of loving yourself and being a little bit fuller, more expressed and healthier version of you than you've been recently.  Otherwise, the fear of being inadequate just continues to recreate itself, and like a dog chasing it's tail, you'll never catch up with the imaginary ghosts you've created in your mind.

Here's a little mantra I plan to utilize more often...

Today, I shall strive to be a little bit better than yesterday. Mentally tougher. Happier. More generous. Not more-so than anyone else, just more than myself previously.

But I ain't gonna lie, you do gotta go beat Oprah's time.

On top of the world, being the best ME I can possibly be...

Way of the Trail Runner VIDEO (see point 5 or 6) - "thou shalt not envy another runner"

Way of the Trail Runner - the Code of the Samurai for Coyotes & People

www.SoCalCoyotes.com

the COYOTE BUSHIDO

“Way of the Trail Runner”

0. Your Physical Health is Ground Zero

Running should enhance your health, not tear you apart. Recovery is key. Always keep in mind the point of doing this is to maximize your health/fitness/well-being. If you are constantly pushing, never taking time for recovery (especially if you’re prepping for “an ultra”) you will soon break down or burn out. Keep an eye on your energy levels, your health, and your physical aches-n-pains. Either we make time to self-maintain or soon we’ll be doing all the things we should have been doing all along while injured.

1. Respect the Run

 Running is truly a gift.  Always strive to appreciate that you can move your body in an inspired, elegant and amazing way.  Even a bad run is still a part of a great day more often than not. You are challenging yourself for sport, and your body will react and respond and build you stronger. Running is one of the greatest representations of “you get out what you put in”.

2. Respect Your Fellow Athlete

Anyone and everyone who runs/hikes/walks (bikes/rides/etc.) deserves our deepest respect. Those who get out there and JUST DO IT, it doesn’t matter the distance, speed or frequency, on that day, you are an athlete and we are humbled by you.

3. Respect the Trails

No matter where you live, you can always visit some amazing places to run. Be it a local park or a mountain, canyon or beach, MOTHER EARTH deserves your deepest respect. She nurtures us, and we should honor this. It’s not enough to simply not litter. Pick up anything you see out there. We are using the trail, beach or path to better ourselves; let’s leave them better too.  Step up your game.  It will feel really good and you will inspire others to do the same.

4. Remember Where You Started

Whether it was 28-years ago or 28-days ago, remember how far you’ve come. Try not to waste time wishing you were better/faster/more fit than another time/period in your life, work to be better now.  There was a time you might have found running difficult, laborious or even punishment, but now, you can enjoy yourself, have fun and improve with mindful remembrance.

5. Thou Shalt Not Envy (Another Runner)

Much of an athlete’s success is determined prior to their workouts beginning.  Never begrudge someone else the hard work they did to improve. Measure yourself against yourself, and be generous with that measurement (be glass half full).

6. Lead (By Example)

Commit yourself to having an impact in the lives of others (runners & non-runners alike). Running doesn’t just improve you physically; it improves your overall health, well being, vitality and mentality. Reinvest that energy in others by inspiring them to take up a physical activity that inspires them. If they hate running, or don’t run, invite them to give it another shot with new perspective. 99% of us LOVED to run when we were children (“Don’t run in the hall/house or around the pool” etc.).  Parents and adults were demanding we ran less back then. Somewhere we took a wrong turn. If you found your way back to that JOY (or never lost it), spread the love. Even if you only inspire 1 in every 10 people, that 1 drop in the pond will send shockwaves through their life and to those around them.  It’s worth it.

7. The “All In” Mentality

You never know which run or race will be your last for a while. Don’t take it for granted. It’s one thing to take an easy day in a tough week; it’s another thing altogether to just run because your training schedule says so. Don’t lose sight of this simple, yet profound thing that we do and how much we miss it when it’s not available as an option.

8. Have Fun (At All Costs)

”If you’re not having fun, you’re doing it wrong.” –Katelyn Benton

It’s better to sacrifice performance goals than it is to sacrifice the enjoyment of running. Yes, it’s fun to improve, but if you make it to the end of a long training program, fall short at a race, and have the feeling “I just wasted 4-5 months of my life” or more, you’ve ripped yourself off in oh so many ways. Start with a fun attitude of gratitude and the race results will follow. No, it won’t happen overnight. If you want that kind of success, you’re in the wrong sport.

9. Pedro’ing It (Notes on Finishing Strong at a Race)

To “Pedro It” means to run your FASTEST 5k of the race in the very last 5k of that race (of ANY distance).

No matter how deep you dig, there’s always more you can give.  When you’re close to the finish, line it up and knock it out, go for it, get it done, *insert clever finishing cliché here”.  The ONE exception to this is when you’ve spent more than 50% of a race running alongside someone (teammate or otherwise), thou shalt not drop the hammer on a partnership (at the very end).  If you’re running for position or wish to beat one teammate in particular, you agree to leave them (behind?) prior to the last 20% of that race (ex. in a 50-mile race, the last 10-miles).

10. There Are Many Eyes In “Team”

When it comes to a run or race there will be good, bad and UGLY days. You are part of a team, especially when you don the COYOTE jersey.  Represent yourself as you’d want your teammates to represent you. Especially when you have a bad day.  The great thing about failing when a part of a team is you get to CELEBRATE the success of your partners in crime instead of wallowing in self-pity. Even when you go to a race where you are a “Coyote pack of 1”, we are globally recognized (thank you Facebook & Twitter), and you represent us all. Make us proud, especially when your performance isn’t what you had hoped.